TODO: Punish Operating System

89% of all video games contain some form of violence. Let’s break convention here, and come to face with another dirty piece of reality, and this time we don’t spare the video-game teetotallers. A glimpse into the average computer user’s psyche would bring up a variety of graphic images; violence, torture, punishment. Not in the sense of the soldiers at Abu Ghraib, but nevertheless, disturbing, surreal fantasies of chaining your computer to a wall, flogging its rear, yelling

“Why don’t you just do what I tell you to!?”

Stop looking around guiltily, this isn’t a sermon about how you need to keep your mind like a garden of fresh flowers. The dark being resides within us all, wishing to control, mindlessly, absolutely. And there finally seems to be an outlet to vent out your frustration, and let loose the demons inside. Enter Petrovich.

Petrovich isn’t your conventional operating system. For one, it isn’t named by a geek planning to pioneer the software industry, or because the founders had some weird fetish for fruits. Ivan Pavlov Petrovich was the guy who demonstrated conditional responses to stimuli in canines. Remember Pavlov’s mice, Pinky and The Brain?

The Petrovich system flaunts four commands, which are most comprehensively explained by example.

petrovich> do something
12:05:17 28 September 2009
petrovich>reward
petrovich>

Pretty self-explanatory. We asks Petrovich to do something, and Petrovich responds with the current date and time. We like that, and reward Petrovich.

petrovich>do something with pamela_anderson001.jpg
file deleted
petrovich>punish
petrovich>do something with pamela_anderson002.jpg
searching web for similar images...
downloading...
petrovich>reward
petrovich>

We ask Petrovich do something with the image. Petrovich deletes it. And we don’t like that. We punish the misbehaving operating system. We ask him to do something with another image. Not wanting to be punished this time, Petrovich looks for similar images online and then proceeds to download them. We like that, let’s reward him this time.

Imagine the possibilites if this concept was developed and layered over your Windows or Linux box? You’d finally have that obedient little puppy, doing your bidding, learning with every punishment, wagging it’s power cable to every reward. You’d finally have a computer you control, and not the other way round!

Go here to check out interesting Petrovich-like ideas.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s